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As a person responsible for sales do you ever think your clients will do or act a certain way and somehow they end up surprising you?

  • By making a decision to buy later, or earlier?
  • By buying less, or more?
  • OR not buying at all?

There is often a discrepancy of what we ‘think’ our clients are going to do and what they actually do.

Why does this happen?

Often it is based on our experience. We’ve had so many clients behave in a certain way under those same circumstances, that we … wait for it…ASSUME THAT this client will too.


We would or wouldn’t buy something, or use it so we ASSUME our clients will think and feel the same.

Its not about youConsciously or subconsciously, we impose our beliefs and values on either the product we sell – “It isn’t worth that much,” or the person we are selling it to –“They will never spend that much.” We are consciously, or more likely unconsciously, dictating what something is worth and what our clients will value it at without understanding why or why not.

Here is a thought, only sell your offer in the context of what is important to your client.

Your questions can expose what someone wants; your expertise can challenge their perceptions; but at the end of the day the client will buy based on what they value.

When selling, it will do you a service to quickly understand that ‘It’s not about YOU!’

This is a lot easier to say than to do. The key to optimizing your ability to influence is to get out of your own way. You need to understand the perspective of the client. To do so, start asking questions and listening without placing your values on their perspective, i.e. making a judgment. Because remember, it’s not about you.

Now that you have the most important four words, the second four words will ensure continued business success.

“It’s about the client, with you in mind.” First, this will keep your focus on understanding your clients/prospects experiences and mindset. Second, once you understand their position, you can apply those experiences and relate them to what you have to offer.

The truth is WE ARE NOT SELLING anything, we are “facilitators” of the BUYING process. We get in our own way all the time, often becoming our own worse enemy. We cannot place our values onto others and yet as sales people and quite frankly within all realms of society we do this all the time.

Only after you understand your prospective clients perspective can you challenge their thinking while working your way to uncovering how you can assist them in achieving their objectives


The foundation of UnSales Sales, is first you need to understand, second accept that it is not about you.


Ignite Your Edgeness™
(An enhance version of you realized when pushing your edge.)

Next time you meet with a client, regardless if you tend to agree or disagree with them, make a conscious decision not to comment until you completely understand their perspective (remember understanding comes from questioning, not commenting). Then, and only then share your perspective. You will very likely observe that the client is much more receptive to your ideas and who knows, maybe you will get a surprise and win a bigger piece of business.

Something to consider in all communications: Not only do we catch ourselves imposing our values onto others in sales situations, but often we do it every day in our regular interactions. We impose our beliefs, consciously or subconsciously on our partners, colleagues, employees, spouses, children etc. Going forward, try to listen to their perspective without judging, you just might learn something new.



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Suzanne F Stevens CSP,* Cultivates conscious contributions™ and influential communications. Suzanne is an International Speaker, Chief Edge Optimizer for Ignite Excellence Inc. Group, Entrepreneur, Philanthropist, Host & Co-producer. She is a recipient of The International Women Alliance World of Difference Award in 2013 – in education. This acknowledgement recognizes people who make a difference in women’s economic empowerment international.  To find out more visit: www.suzannefstevens.com.

Suzanne is one of 60 Certified Speaking Professionals (CSP) in Canada and is included in the 10%of individuals who have this designation internationally.

Originally posted on IgniteU by Suzanne F. Stevens - YouMeWe.

Suzanne F. Stevens - YouMeWe
Suzanne F. Stevens - YouMeWe

Conscious-Contributions™ Cultivator: Author, Professional Speaker, Moderator, and Social Entrepreneur. Founder of YouMeWe Social Impact Group — igniting a culture where your contribution counts for you • your company • your community. YouMeWe.ca | we@youmewe.ca